Off Day

Tuesday, September 27, 2016

There are days that come easy.

I wake well-rested, sun rays peeking through my window, a soft sign that good things are ahead. The day passes quick enough to not linger too long but slow enough that each moment is savored. I'm confident. I'm productive. I feel grounded. I go to the gym and am reminded that I am stronger than I was yesterday. The sun sets and the sky glows pink, yellow, and orange, separately and all at once. I read. I write. I consume words and pour them out, with ease. I am inspired. I am surrounded by people who motivate me.

Then there are other days.

I wake and feel the weight of a thousand days before. My eyes are heavy. Hours tick by abnormally slow, each one feeling like a day in itself. I'm unsettled. I feel disconnected. I skip the gym (and subsequently feel anxious and lazy for it) because my body is exhausted enough. The sun sets at some point but I don't notice. There are things to do that I'm not doing. I read, but I do not write. I cannot write. I read words from individuals far more talented than me. Beautifully crafted, creative, funny, moving words that are far more powerful than any I have ever written. I am discouraged. I am surrounded by people who outshine me.

There are days I don't see what I am, but what I'm not.

There are days I need someone to wrap their arm around me and tell me it's okay. To sit with me, so I know I am not alone. To check in with me, so I know I am cared for. To, quite frankly, tell me that I am good. Good at my job, good as a friend, good as a person. To hold my hand and tell me I'm enough.

There are days I need reminders, that extra dose of kindness. We all do.

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